Who Pays for the Wedding?

 The etiquette of how wedding costs are split is evolving, but some traditions remain in place. Here's What Each Family Is Traditionally Responsible For.

Traditionally the bride's parents were responsible for hosting (and paying for) the entire celebration, today many couples join both sets of parents in contributing.

While it's by no means mandatory for the bride's family to pay for the engagement party and the groom's parents to foot the bill for the rehearsal dinner,  it's helpful to understand who historically has paid for each aspect of the big day, even your parents (or your future spouse's parents) are generously offering to pay for part or all of the wedding,

A working knowledge of how a wedding bill typically shakes out will help everyone navigate this tricky business.

Discussing Who Pays for the Wedding First with Families

It's essential to have this conversation as soon as you start planning to set down your wedding budget.

It informs all of the other decisions round your wedding, otherwise, you are planning in a bubble that may not be your reality.

So it is not fun or cute to talk about money, but it is super important.

Traditionally, most costs were covered by the bride's family, with the groom's family and the groom adding smaller amounts. But now things changed. 

They are much more modern and equal, taking into account both families' resources, guest lists, expectations, and the wedding location, as well as the resources and wants of the couple.

Families must discuss and be open and honest about what is possible for them.

What the Bride's Family Traditionally Pays For?

The bride's family traditionally pays for the majority of the wedding-related expenses, from the engagement party to the newlyweds' getaway car.

These costs have typically paid by bride's family:

Engagement party

Wedding planner

Invitations and day-of stationery

Photography and videography

Venue

Bride's attire (and all accessories, including veil)

Ceremony and reception floral arrangements, décor, and rentals

Food and drink

Wedding cake

Guest transportation

Travel and lodging costs for bridesmaids and officiant

Most other reception expenses

Now wedding expenses have grown tremendously over the years and have no longer become the exclusive responsibility of the bride's parents, the other partner's parents and the couple contributing to any of those costs.

What the Groom's Family Traditionally Pays For?

The groom's family has traditionally picked up the tab for fewer wedding items, which have included:

Marriage license and officiant fee

Corsages and boutonnières for family members on both sides

Lodging for groomsmen

Rehearsal dinner costs

Reception alcohol (optional)

DJ or band (optional)

Rehearsal dinners used to range in size from a small, wedding-party-only occasion to a larger soirée that included half or more of the wedding guests. 

Now, though, as many couples opt for welcome parties that are open to all of their guests, the groom's parents aren't expected to take on the entire cost. 

What the Bride Traditionally Pays For?

Traditionally, the bride would personally pay for:

Wedding flowers and gifts for the bridesmaids

All hair and makeup costs

Groom's wedding band

Groom's wedding gift

It's more common today for couples to host and pay for a portion or all of their wedding expenses. Many modern women also contribute to the overall costs of the ceremony and reception—any and everything their budget allows.

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What the Groom Traditionally Pays For?

Traditional expectations for the groom's financial contribution included:

Engagement and wedding rings

Marriage license and officiant fee (if not covered by parents)

Bride's bouquet

Groomsmen's boutonnières and gifts

Bride's wedding gift

Honeymoon